So, here’s some weekend fun. During our trip, we drove. A Lot. And being on the road as much as we were, we encountered a number of other drivers. Now, I don’t know about you, but I tend to talk to other drivers–wait, that’s not accurate–I tend to instruct and command other drivers to operate their vehicles in a manner that eases my travel. Of course, I do this in my normal “talking voice’ with my windows rolled up, so they never obey (but that’s besides the point).
When doing this, I usually bestow a name on these fellow drivers based on their vehicles rather than the driver themselves. For example, rather than referring to the 60-year-old, bearded gentleman in the Blue Bronco as “Beardy”, I will call him “Blue-Broncs” or some such variation. Anyway, I forced my wife to take down a list of nicknames that I gave to fellow drivers during our trip, and I thought they might be fun for a laugh…or maybe that’s just me. If nothing else, I know I’m not the only one who does this.
Silverfish (a silver sedan), as in “I’m gonna pass Silverfish.”
Redbot (a red coupe), as in “Come on, Redbot, you’re holdin’ up everybody!”
White…Dunk (a big rig with a white trailer), as in “I want to get into the other lane, Jam, but this white…dunk is boxin’ me out.”
This Jaunt (also, for a big rig), as in “Yeah, I’ma switch lanes once This Jaunt gets outta the way.”
Mother of Pearl (for a champaign-toned vehicle), “This Mother of Pearl keeps breakin’ in front of me, and I can’t get around him.”
Bike-rack McGillicuddy (for a vehicle with a loaded bikerack on it), as in “Hey, I’m watching out for Bike-rack McGillicuddy over there; I don’t want one of those cycles flying off and hittin’ the windshield.”
Whitefish (a white sedan), as in “Outta the way, WhiteFish!”
Whitebread (a white sedan), as in “Look out, Whitebread!”
Van Wilder (a 12-person van), as in, “Van Wilder is gettin’ over.”
Truck Turner (an Expedition or truck like it), as in “And Truck Turner’s with him!” (“him” being Van Wilder)
Aquamarine (a bluish-greenish coupe) , as in “Hey man, Aquamarine is in my way, I got no moves.”
Petrolio (a tanker with the word “Petreleum” on the side), as in “Let’s go, Petrolio”, in reference to his need to speed up.
Blue Chip (a blue sedan), as in “Blue Chip’s behind me now; I’m movin’ over.”
And of course, my favorite of the trip, from my wife, Jamie.
Werner Van Trap (an 18-wheeler rig for the “Werner” freight line), as in “Okay, Werner Von Trap, let’s do this.” (“doing this” meaning “driving faster through a tunnel”)
Hey, gotta do something to pass the time on the road! Thanks for reading!