I’m no Intellectual

Following my introduction to the Writing as Worship series, I was quick to the stay the course and post the initial full entry, “Writing as a Creationist”. I was happy with both posts overall, and I was eager to continue to explore the ideas they proposed.

Then came the hard work of actually doing it, and I was completely unprepared. I hit and continue to bang head against a mental wall.

I have come to question if I perhaps proposed and embraced this series prematurely. I have so many ideas about it, but I am having a horrible time placing them in a useful order. I am realizing that no matter how much I reach toward intellectual argument and grand thought, I simply seem incapable of producing it. Further, I feel as though I am simply stating the same thing, again and again.

Needless to say, I’m wondering if I really have the mind to continue this series–at least in any way that I feel it would be worth reading. Sadly, I am almost seeing it more as a faltering attempt at intellectualism than an actual means of encouraging fellow writers in their pursuit from a spiritual perspective.

My thesis has not changed. Writing can be worship, even if I am not very good at expressing why (oh, the irony). It’s interesting that I’ve come to this revelation, given that I was recently doing an inventory of all the projects I want to do. I recognized that they would be concurrently impossible–the pursuit of doing any number of them well would automatically require the abandonment of others. I’m almost wondering if that’s not the case here: if my Writing as Worship series should be tabled until I can better express it, even as I turn my direct attention back to other projects for which I am more mentally suited.

I still do not know, but time will tell. So, consider this yet more filler as I attempt to corral my thoughts into some sensible, digestible fashion. If I cannot, this series may have run its present course, and frankly, I’d rather put it to rest and express it well later than push through writing it now and do so poorly.

Please check back in two weeks to see what I decide; to be quite frank, I am looking forward to seeing where I land as much as you are.


About C.J.:
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