Others Will Help You Survive the Pain. Do the Same

Life is hard. Survival requires work ; thriving, even more. Perhaps the best truth one can accept is that you are going to experience more hurt, pain, and suffering than you expect. Things may go well for a season, but challenges will come. They are coming. They will be here sooner than you think. This is true for human beings. It may be an unfavorable reality, but the sooner you accept it, the better your life will be.

Of course, what’s also true is that things will be calm and peaceful again; or at least they have the capacity to. And YOU have a great deal with that outcome. But it will go far better for you if you are not alone.

An improved situation is not guaranteed; healing is not an inevitability.  People can linger in their bitterness, resentment, and pain for a great deal longer than they need to. I know I do. Combating suffering is difficult, and it’s doubly difficult when you’re in the midst of it because the very act of fighting requires an incredible amount of effort and energy.

So, again, don’t do it alone. Accept help. Embrace it. Engage it. Position yourself now so that when things get bad—-and they will—-you won’t have to face the abyss on your own. Even if you are blinded by the darkness, the friend alongside you may have clarity of vision to help you get one step closer to the light.

I won’t get into detail, but last fall was one of the most difficult seasons of my life, and I would not have made it without the love and kindness of others. Without unexpected but needed encouragement and affirmation, I don’t know how things would be right now. I came to a point where I knew I needed professional help, and I got it (and continue to get it)—but it was the combination of that trained guidance and the personal interactions of my day-to-day that made the difference.

And things are far better today than a month ago, or two months ago, or five months ago—-the very fact that I am blogging is a testament to that.

So, why am I writing this? Simple. If you are in a good place, be a good person. A real person. If you see the opportunity to benefit someone else’s life near you, do it. In small and meaningful ways. Pay legitimate, honest compliments. Offer a kind word of affirmation. If you have the kind of relationship where hugs are permitted, offer one. Be sincere. Be kind. As you are able, do good to those you know.

Over the last several months, the kindness of others toward me has been small and great, and it has mattered, likely more than those around me knew. It really has. And your acts of kindness, charity, and goodwill will matter also.

Give freely.